I’m “biast” (con): nothing
(what is this about? see my critic’s minifesto)
Deliver me from little boys who think that tossing together some ideas stolen from Mad Max and Firefly, some visual tropes swiped from Tarantino, and some “hilarious” characters who are sexist morons makes for a fun, sexy, badass flick. Oh, are writers Henry Saine, Jason Dodson, and Colin Ebeling (Saine directs) older than 12? Coulda fooled me. Who else would name a whorehouse the “Thirsty Beaver”? *cue adolescent sniggering* In a standard grungy postapocalyptic future — though one in which there’s still gas for muscle cars and delicate white stockings and “hooker boots” to be had — “the Council” hires “bounty killers” to take out “white-collar criminals” for whom “the apocalypse was the greatest opportunity that came our way,” although we have scant evidence of this. There’s little that passes for a story here — a full hour in, I had no idea what is supposedly at stake for our “heroes,” bounty killers Drifter (Matthew Marsden) and Mary Death (Christian Pitre). This is the genre equivalent of soft-core porn: it doesn’t care how strained and derivative it is as long as it is delivering flying bullets, fast cars, and closeups on women’s sashaying asses.
