No, yes, please, let us continue the tradition of telling stories about men who proudly don’t care about anything thrust into positions of power and authority purely by dint of birthright. I mean, as long as they have some smart, dedicated, noble-minded women around to support them and guide them and show them the way to wise manhood, that’s fine, right? Like, maybe some women who have been working toward whatever lofty goals the man will eventually “achieve” even though he’s just arrived on the scene and, as previously noted, couldn’t give a shit about the things they will now step aside and let him take all the credit for.
I certainly cannot see any way in which this recurring cultural narrative could have any negative impact on the world.
So here we have Aquaman, about a fish-man, Arthur Curry (Jason Momoa: Justice League, The Bad Batch), who is half human and half Atlantean… as in the ancient underwater realm of Atlantis. He can breathe underwater, see even at depth in the dark ocean, swim superfast, and communicate with the animals of the seas. (For some reason he is also superstrong, because, I dunno, fish are unreasonably brawny?) And his Atlantean half is not just any-old peasant, either: His mother, Atlanna (Nicole Kidman: The Beguiled, Big Little Lies), was queen of Atlantis, though not a willing one, so she ran away, had a kid with a human man (Temuera Morrison: Moana, Green Lantern), and then got dragged back again. Now, another unwilling queen, Mera (Amber Heard: The Danish Girl, Magic Mike XXL), comes to the human world, the surface world, to bring Arthur back to Atlantis because his half-brother, King Orm (Patrick Wilson: The Commuter, The Founder), is up to no good and must be stopped, and apparently only Arthur can stop him, by taking up the throne of Atlantis. Mera can’t stop Orm, even though she seems to be secretly part of a resistance against him. She’s just a girl, after all.
Here is another recurring cultural narrative that by all means must endure, and that surely isn’t doing any damage whatsoever: science fiction and fantasy stories — of which Aquaman is arguably a bit of both — told by men — the screenwriters here are director James Wan and three other guys — that feature wildly inventive alternate worlds full of magic and wonder and all manner of fanciful places and creatures… and is just as fucking sexist as the real world. The limits to the imagination at play here are shocking but tediously predictable. God forbid we should enrage the fanboys who would howl should any hint of social-justice warfare edge into their fish-man-who-would-be-king story. Which, they may all rest assured, has not happened at all. Unless there is something objectionable in the non-blond-Aryan Momoa — who is partly of Native Hawaiian and Native American descent — in the lead role? (*Googles* Yup, some people think so.)
Indeed, even Aquaman’s nominally pro-environmental angle doesn’t dare to say anything even slightly radical. The badness of King Orm is all about how he wants to lead a war against the surface world because we’ve been dumping all our garbage in his ocean since forever, and just generally doing our best to destroy the planet, and it’s pretty difficult to fault him for this. But Arthur, straddling the two worlds as he does, can prevent this, apparently… and so Aquaman ends up reassuring us polluting humans that we don’t have to change our ways and clean up our act — literally or figuratively — because the half-human guy will make it all better and save us from suffering any consequences for our crimes.
There is no suspense in anything here, and so no real sense of triumph even when we’re meant to be cheering. It barely even registers when Arthur morphs every so slightly from a guy who might engage in some light maritime rescuing, even though it means missing happy hour, to a guy who is no longer scoffing at the “fairy tales” that indicate he is the rightful ruler of Atlantis. (He has to find a legendary trident and publicly wield it. Not pull a sword from a stone and publicly wield it. Totally different thing. King of the who?) Of course some of what he has to do involves dick-measuring hand-to-hand combat with his half brother, or with other manly obstacles, and for a guy who thinks with his muscles, that’s just fun. He’s not particularly challenged by anything that happens to him. He doesn’t struggle. As long as Arthur gets to keep being the same old pretty but colorless meathead (spoiler: he does), it makes no difference to him.
What else is there? A lot of imagery of the high-tech underwater realms, especially the city of Atlantis, that seems inspired by 80s mall-store black-light posters. (Hello, Spencer Gifts!) Jarring detours down an Indiana Jones/Dan Brown tangent, then another into a Lost Continent realm. (This movie is trying to be a lot of movies all at once, and it doesn’t work.) Undersea action sequences — big battles, chases — in which director Wan (The Conjuring 2, Insidious) offers us no sense of geography or space, no sense of who most of the characters involved are, and so they just mush together into a lot of noise and psychedelic chaos. There’s a human villain trying to kill Arthur, but when Manta (Yahya Abdul-Mateen II: Boundaries, Baywatch) — who is hellbent to get revenge on “the Aquaman” for a thing Arthur did — has a chance to shoot Arthur, literally has Arthur in his sights, he fails to do so. (It’s much worse than the typical movie trope of the bad guy who fails to take the opportunity to kill the good guy: there’s no feint toward giving Manta a reason to hesitate. He’s not even monologuing at the time!) When Aquaman isn’t an incoherent mess, it’s little more than Jason Momoa standing around smirking or Amber Heard shifting instantly from disgust of Arthur to adoration of him. Which is barely any better.
I’m kind of hoping the movie bombs, just so the site doesn’t get swarmed by Red Pillers rushing to defend it.
I loved the movie and the rest of the world does too it has already grossed over 250 million and it hasn’t even been widely released in the USA!
I wish you will watch it yourself and not let this buffoon tell you what is good or bad. She doesn’t even make sense, she tried to make it seem like the movie is sexist 😂.
Boy, nothing gets by you!
MaryAnn, darling, get fucked by someone you find sexually attractive, even if you have to pay, please, it’ll take the edge off.
Olivia, darling, you’re banned.
Sorry nothing connects. Thanks for the review.
The Aquaman story doesn’t end there. In the comics, Mera is currently the Queen of Atlantis and Arthur is no longer King. Mera is the supreme leader so all this sexist crap the reviewing is spewing is nonsense. If you watch Indiana Jones and pretty much every 80’s action movie, the women there are all damsels in distress and useless for real. In Aquaman the women are their own heroes. Mera is Aquaman’s equal. She rescues him and he rescues her. How come the reviewer doesn’t mention that?
Mera doesn’t have Arthur’s birth right but despite that she is chosen to lead as the sole ruler ( because of her merits) after Arthur is dethroned in a coup ( Aquaman comics are like Game of Thrones underwater). Movie is a lot of fun. Reviewer was more focused on her sexist narrative than enjoying the movie itself.
Mera doesn’t have to be anyways. She was already a badass in the movie and saved Aquaman a lot. So the fact that she thinks, it’s sexist shows the world we live in now. Filled with people that don’t know what the hell they are talking about, they just say things to make it seem like they are important.
Yeah, you just keep telling yourself that.
You don’t have to agree with the hostess of this site but you’re not likely to convince many people of the rightness of your views if you insult her. And you’re certainly not convincing me that I need to buy a ticket to see this movie.
So this movie isn’t sexist because some comics involving the same characters are totally not sexist. Okay, got it.
I am not reviewing the Aquaman mythology, and however many versions of the story there may be. I am reviewing this movie.
In this movie, Mera is nothing but a supporting character in Arthur’s journey. This is not nonsense. It is sexist shit and I’m sick of it.
I invite you to peruse my Where Are the Women? rating criteria, particularly “Is there a woman who is mostly pretty awesome and perfect who is present to support a man improving himself?”:
https://www.flickfilosopher.com/2016/04/where-are-the-women-rating-criteria-explained.html#7
And “Is she the only woman in an otherwise all-male ensemble?”:
https://www.flickfilosopher.com/2016/04/where-are-the-women-rating-criteria-explained.html#6
Yes, this shit is sexist.
I don’t support anyone that uses the word sexist to describe a movie. In fact, I don’t like anyone that uses that tired ass card especially when it doesn’t even apply whatsoever. She acts like the world is burning, and we still live in 19th-20th century. Woman are far more proactive nowadays than ever before, so all this sexist bs shtick need to go. Everyone should have limits but no, sexist lol. Like they have to change the history of this character and make Mera the main leader of this and the face of all this because god forbid a man is a king and it’s about his story. The movie is about the superhero Aquaman. Will it be convincing, if a man is the center point of a movie called Wonder Woman. I bet she believes woman should fight men in boxing or mma because they are equals.
Fact is, her arguments are weak, the fact that she ignored the best parts of the movie and focused so much on vague descriptions, and not even mention anything positives, shows she’s clearly doing it for clicks. Mera is 1000x a kickass in this movie. She makes it seem like Mera needed Aquaman, even tho it’s the other way around, Aquaman needed her more. Why will i care if you buy a ticket or not.
And I don’t support anyone who denies the realities of sexism. So I guess we’re even.
Give me something to latch onto here. Does the camera linger lovingly over Jason Momoa’s amazing bod? It could be worth all the boring superfishman nonsense for 2 hours of shirtless, wet Mo, right? Tell me that the filmmakers, if they aren’t going to portray women like, doing stuff, at least portray raw, unapologetic male sexuality as desirable and positive.
You…aren’t going to tell me that, are you?
Of course not. This is directed by a man. That would be supergayqueer. No homo!
Until the Justice League movie, the sum of my awareness of the character of Aquaman was Comic Book Guy on The Simpsons saying, “But Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills. You’re from two different worlds.” Then, as he sees a nuclear bomb is about to explode in his face he says, “Ooh, I’ve wasted my life.” I’d be happy for that to remain my dominant notion of this property. Continuing to be a broken record, I think I’ll just watch The Last Jedi again. The actual transgressive-for-Hollywood nature of that movie still resonates one year later.
Ever* so slightly
Rotten Tomatoes has got to be so desperate for negative Aquaman reviews that they’d even count yours. I’ve never read anything more nonsensical.
Oh, honey, that’s not how Rotten Tomatoes works.
https://www.wired.com/story/justice-league-rotten-tomatoes-fans/
There are so many references in Aquaman to film classics and the movie
is so competently shot that it amazes me that someone who is into cimema
(as opposed to a particular social agenda) wouldn’t like it.
You think references and competence make for a good movie? Try raising your bar a bit.
MaryAnn, question. What is it about angry feminist pseudo lesbians who pathologically need to play the victim and find offense in everything and live to label everything with an -ism or a -phobe, that they always need to have the last word?
What is it in your life that’s left you so existentially wanting, so intellectually vacuous that anger and tilting at non existent windmills puffed by an illusory patriarchy are the only things which apparently fulfill that gaping rage within you.
Why are you so desperately unhappy? And what would Aquaman doing what you think it should do, do to make you any happier?
How did you get so old and yet remain so generic? Peace MaryAnn. xxx
FYI to everyone: This is the sort of shit that gets you banned. Don’t be like “Olivia.”
Great Poseidon’s beard, I just looked at Olivia’s post history and noticed the charming suggestions she made above. I’m sorry I tried to use reason – clearly this individual needs some professional help.
No matter how many times it happens, I’m baffled by people who come to another person’s website foaming at the mouth and immediately launching into a politically charged rant full of nonsensical (I still don’t know what “pseudo lesbians” even means), hackneyed stereotypes whose primary complaints are: you’re an angry social justice warrior who is too politically biased, and it’s just a movie anyway so don’t get so upset, and why don’t you talk more about the movie, you’re so miserable and alone and sexless and you’re ruining all the fun in my life!!!!
I don’t expect an enormous amount of introspection from people like “Olivia,” but how furious and confused does one have to be not to realize that this vague “other” is really a projection of everything they hate about themselves?
In the 80’s, I lived in a small suburb of Kansas City, and everyday the local news would talk about crimes committed by African Americans in the city. I would constantly hear racist comments about how selfish and greedy and cruel and impulsive and violent, and racist black people are made by some of the most selfish, greedy, cruel, violent, racist, and impulsive people in town. It’s the same damn thing still festering in the darkest corners of the internet, crawling out from its cave and into the white house, and the media is like a circle of middle schoolers yelling: “fantastic, more talking heads yelling insults at each other! FIght! FIght! FIght! $$$$$” *sigh*
But don’t worry y’all, a hero with big muscles who mentally commands fish to act against their self-interest is gonna become king of a walled city, get a sweet ride, smash a hot “redhead,” have some beers with his adoring broskis, and fix the Earth. It’ll be so easy folks, believe me.
Seen this movie yesterday. It is more of a fantasy movie- like Cinderella. Not what was expected from DC.
And is that good or bad for you ? I mean, being more of a fantasy movie.
uh, aren’t most of DC’s characters “fantasy”? Superman? The Thing? The Torch… sorry to tell you…. not. real. people.
You must be the Grinch who stole Christmas not to find Aquaman fun. In fact, the whole movie is a blast.
Besides, I can’t think of a boy who wouldn’t like to swim with the dolphins as the young Arthur did, or of a teen who wouldn’t like to be in that cool training scene with Vulko on the beach. Obviously, you can’t relate to those experiences though.
If you enjoyed Aquaman, good for you. Why do you need her to enjoy it? Does her negative review ruin your own experience? Because that’s what “stealing Christmas” implies.
Do you think girls might like to swim with dolphins or train their bodies?
What I mean is that one has to have a Grinch or a Scrooge spirit not to like it because the movie is extremely likeable. It was deliberately made to be uncontroversial and simple, straightforward fun. Besides, it is visually stunning. The notion tthat it lacks a sense of geography and space is, as other posts said, completely nonsensical.
You understand that people have different tastes and can have different emotional responses to movies, right? Just because a film is “extremely likeable” TO YOU doesn’t mean everyone else has to feel the same way. And if they don’t, it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with them, or that you have to attack them for it.
Be happy that you enjoyed the film, and let other people feel however they want to feel about it.
Well, you sure schooled me! You’ve completely changed my mind. Now I love the movie! Amazing job, you.
damn, this is one cynical review it just hits the road running in anger. Also “flickfilosopher?” “filosopher??” some cutesy little branding? it’s stupid. That is another reason why your hitpiece, and this site is yes, stupid. On a Filosophical level..psssh.
Wah! I don’t agree so I’m lashing out at you personally! Grow up.
“Hits the road running in anger” is my new motto. Thanks!
i think my favorite line of his is “psssh”…
Hmmm is this a review of the movie Aquaman or a diary entry detailing Ms. Johnson’s sexual anxieties, her jealousy of the beautiful strong women that are attracted to the “guys” , “meatheads” that she, herself both desires and fears? Maybe both Arthur & Mera have better hair than our Ms. Johnson…
Nevertheless- the movie is quite the experience- saw it Friday- the NYC audience- lots of couples- and a diverse crowd- errupted in applause 3 times during the movie- Such a blast!
My hair is actually, legitimately red, unlike Mera’s.
But sure, yeah, my dream in life is to be wise, powerful, capable, and caring, and use all my awesomeness to support some jerk dude taking all the glory for my work. Yessiree.
Do you have an inadequacy problem? Seriously, do you not have anything better to do than troll negative reviews of Aquaman?
yup, basically, *ALL* she has to do is review movies… all movies. the good, the bad, and the ugly (like this one). i think your fury at her review shows that it is *you* with the inadequacy problem. are you only validated if someone else likes what you like?
While I approve of the sentiment, you might want to double-check which comment MPC was replying to.
I’m not taking umbrage at MAJ’s review but the moron who commented on it.
Please re-read my statement.
MPC, sincere apologies… i lost track of the thread.
“I enjoyed this film and I’m the only person in the world that can be right, you have a different opinion so I’m going to insult you and try and make you feel bad!” What a sad little life you must lead.
Hey hey hey! It’s time for another game of “Let’s see if any fanboys show up to this comment section who are mature enough to disagree without personal insults, using only intelligent and substantive commentary about the film to make their case.”
I won’t hold my breath.
D’ya think they realize what sort of ambassadors for DC fandom they are serving as?
I’ve pretty much enjoyed, even loved, every one of the DCEU movies so far (yes, even that one), but it’s gotten to be that I don’t want to even engage in discussion about them, because the fanbois are such… fanbois.
Well, you should feel free to talk about what you love about the film here, at least. :-)
I do! We’ll see if I have anything interesting to add once I’ve seen it. Which, despite the red light here, I plan to. I’m a DC>Marvel 4evar. Even Jonah Hex is on my to watch list.
Yeah, I dug it. I think Momoa is a hoot. I thought it was visually stunning, but “looking good” has never a been a problem DCEU problem. With the exception of Amber Heard, the costume design was equally lovely. That Black Manta costume is on point. The action could stand to be quite a bit less frantic. (What’s the difference between “frantic” and “frenetic”, anyway?)
They don’t care. If you don’t think like them, then you’re clearly the Enemy of the People.
The quality of human beings showing up to defend this film aren’t increasing my interest in seeing it.
What a bad review. The movie was great tho. Nothing sexist in the movie, so, get your facts straight. Beautiful people on both side of the aisle. They made good use of both main characters attributes. My theater floor was dripping wet, I guess Aquaman makes everything wet. Hows that for sexist lol.
Great? I went to the special “fan event” showing last night and the reaction of most of the audience was pretty close to mine. It was fun, had some nice moments and very imaginative sets, but also was muddled, had too many things crammed into it, and so on. Like several of the other DC films, if you looked closely you could see how this could have been a great film but they fumbled it.
I was also annoyed by the way that it sometimes seemed unclear exactly what powers the Atlanteans had. Mera’s ability to somehow create water force beams, for example, didn’t fit. (But then again, I’m probably a really old time fan boy. I first read Aquaman in the early 1960s, when he basically could breath underwater, swim fast, and control fish: no super strength, invulnerability, etc.,)
Wow. I’ve seen many reasons that critics dislike films, but I’ve never seen this before. Before you go condemning the DC movies of how they mistreated you with their “pirate angel” Aquaman… can you state that Marvel isn’t guilty of the very same thing…??? (Yes, we know you’re a very big fan)
If you’re complaining about the plot (which is fair), then I’m pointing out the blatant hypocrisy about recommending Rampage, Black Panther or Infinity War (where the plot was the action,,,sigh)
Is crying wolf about this movie being the second coming of Weinstein, the best way to make your point…??? (Obvious WB and DC ulterior motive) By the way, is Wonder Woman a Marvel film…???
Bottom line, if you disliked Aquaman, that’s fine…but the reasons you call it sexist are present in half the Marvel movies, difference is, you don’t have an issue with those… so if you don’t backup your own convictions… why should anyone else…??? Have a nice day.
This is how I know I can dismiss what you’re saying.
And that’s exactly why folks dismiss what you’re saying… (false equivalencies … leave it up to us trolls to point them out…)
Have a nice day
“leave it up to us trolls to point them out…”
commenter, know thyself.
You haven’t read the rest of comments…??? That’s what us “fanboys” who disagree are called…
It speaks volumes that I’m being dismissed and name called, but not refuted… at all… (Weren’t you supposed to be the mature, intelligent and substantive ones…???)
Anyway… If I’ve said anything non-factual or rude or insulting, please point it out…Have a nice day.
Dude, your straw-man mischaracterization of my review — there’s nothing remotely like me calling it “the second coming of Weinstein” — simply screams that you don’t have the slightest understanding of the issues here. So go educate yourself on feminism before you try commenting on sexism.
Please, please add the missing word to that sentence.
Done.
So your argument, is that you can’t defend why you don’t condemn the Marvel Films of sexism as you do the Aquaman movie, although they share the same faults you’re complaining about… and you can’t do it because of my ignorance on feminism…
Well… while I may be a knuckle dragging caveman who’s ignorant on feminism… I’m a father of two girls. I know of inequality and harassment in the work place against women because I’ve seen it. As a minority I know what prejudice looks like… (So much for my strawman argument)
I’ve preached my girls to speak up, do something and shed some light anytime they feel slighted. Not to believe they fall under the status quo, but that they create the status quo. Bottom line, I got two fighters that make me very proud.
So… sue me when I see and respond about accusations of sexism about a movie about a guy that talks to fish… (kind of trivializes the subject). Even worse, the same complaints are present in other (Marvel) movies but nothing is mentioned… (that’s called hypocrisy where I grew up…)
You and I both know there isn’t anything intentionally sexist in either the DC or Marvel films, but you decided to make it an issue so you can bash the DC movie. If you were really serious, you would had raised this flag with the Marvel movies and the questions would be if this was a systemic or intentional issue. Something you don’t even mention…
Well, you can continue to say whatever you want (that’s your job) and condescend anyone who disagrees (your prerogative)
Sad thing is that it seems that you and your acolytes, take a vastly different lesson from comic book movies that we the “fanboys trolls” do…
Have a nice day.
Dude, she does call out Marvel on sexism whenever she sees it. Look up her reviews of the Guardians films and the first Ant-Man. If her reviews of those films aren’t completely negative, it’s because she found other elements to enjoy that counterbalanced the sexism. She didn’t see any counterbalancing elements here.
Also, perspectives evolve over time. If someone gets increasingly fed up with the same sexist shit that appears in films over and over, they may give a sexist film in 2018 a harsher review than a similarly sexist film that they saw several years ago. This isn’t a science, it’s about writing her responses to a film based on how she feels NOW.
What if they speak up about something they see as unjust, but you don’t agree and you think it’s nothing? Do you respect their perspective, or do you override their opinion with your own? ‘Cause that’s what you’re doing here. A female critic is calling out what she sees as sexism in a movie, and you insist on trying to invalidate her view. If you want women and their views to be respected, maybe start by doing it yourself.
As a minority, you have a more personal and up-close view of what racism looks like, that a non-minority wouldn’t have. So non-minorities should respect your perspective on racism, and I’m sure you get annoyed when white people try to explain racism and prejudice to you. MaryAnn, as a woman, has a more personal and up-close view of what sexism looks like, than you do as a man. Why won’t you give her perspective similar respect? Why are you trying to explain sexism and feminism to HER?
Sexism doesn’t have to be intentional. That’s what makes it systemic — it’s not necessarily the malicious, conscious intent of individuals, it’s unquestioned structures and unexamined assumptions and attitudes. Such as the storytelling attitudes she sees in this movie.
Couple of points… If I may
If you or anyone can find elements that counter balance sexism… I have no respect or need for your opinion.
At no point I lecture anyone on sexism or feminism… I pointed out that she gladly recommended other movies with the same faults she is pointing out here. That is not in any way, no matter how many times you repeat it, invalidating or correcting or lecturing. Questioning why one gets a pass while the other doesn’t, is a fair question. This is a review site, where films should be treated in a impartial manner… If that’s not the case, then a ‘”fed up” note should be posted…
And most importantly… my girls know that if they or anyone speak up about anything they see unjust… It doesn’t matter if other people disagree. they will find resolution when they do… and not a second before (or opinion)
I already stated that if anything I said was non-factual or disrespectful, please point it out… I’ll gladly retract and apologize.
And “the quality of human beings showing up” (sound familiar…???) to discuss have made me realize not to expect the same courtesy…
Have a nice day…
No such thing as being impartial (or objective) about art.
I know as much about art than I do about feminism… But the comment wasn’t about the art, it was your stating what is or isn’t sexist. But you already clarified… your recommendation depends on what else the movie has going on…
I am not defending the sexism of Marvel’s movies. But those movie have a lot more going on in them to recommend them anyone. This one does not.
No, you do not get to use this as a defense.
Speak for yourself.
I’m sorry but I disagree… if you are willing to recommend, then yes you are defending… There isn’t “a little or a lot more going on”… that would makes me recommend anything I’d consider sexist…
You called me ignorant of feminism, (which I may be…) me telling the story of my girls is my best way to convey that woman equality in everything is very personal to me. Not a defense,(don’t need any by the way…) just the truth…
And if believe Marvel or DC are intentionally sexist… good for you…??? But as long they have a lot more going on…
If women (or people of color, or anyone not a straight white cis able-bodied man) couldn’t find ways to enjoy our pop culture, in spite of its marginalizing of us, we wouldn’t have any pop culture to enjoy.
You have no idea what you’re talking about.
And that’s why you’re here to tell us which “sexist” movie is good and which is bad…
Reviewing movies is such a nuanced science I imagine…
Well, thanks for the “help”, but there’s a lot of folks like me that will respectfully decline… Like everything else, I’ll decide what I like and what I don’t… And your reviews… I don’t like… at all…
i’ve been around “fandom” a lot longer than you have most likely and i know a troll when i see one. merely meant it was unusual for a troll to recognize himself as such.
Did you watch a New Hope in the theater where Han was the only one to shoot…? I did…
And i’m the “If I have nothing nice to say about someone, I keep it to myself…” kind of troll… Have a nice day.
I saw a (free) advance screening of it tonight, and while I enjoyed parts of it, MAJ definitely nailed a lot of the problems I had with it. Parts of the movie definitely feel disjointed, way too much CG and both villains are a wash. I thought Momoa was a hoot though.
I don’t think the film really comes together until the final 15 minutes. Which is a shame, really.
“The badness of King Orm is all about how he wants to lead a war against the surface world because we’ve been dumping all our garbage in his ocean since forever, and just generally doing our best to destroy the planet, and it’s pretty difficult to fault him for this. But Arthur, straddling the two worlds as he does, can prevent this, apparently… and so Aquaman ends up reassuring us polluting humans that we don’t have to change our ways and clean up our act — literally or figuratively — because the half-human guy will make it all better and save us from suffering any consequences for our crimes.”
Wow, this was literally an episode of Darkwing Duck 25 years ago, except there they acknowledged the undersea people had a point and had to apologize and try to fix things.
Let’s get plagiarous!
A wonderful review. While I don’t think the movie was that bad (it was actually okay-ish; but for a DC movie, that’s actually bad; it just didn’t live up to my expectations, and wasn’t as good as Wonder woman), I was a little troubled by the casual way they dealt with sexism, and the lack of a compelling narrative.
Okay, be specific. Point out the other reviews you’re talking about, where you feel the movie’s problems are EXACTLY the same as Aquaman‘s, but she treats them differently.
That’s not how it works. All critics (all PEOPLE) have biases. You just have to understand those biases so you know where people’s opinions are coming from. MaryAnn tries to be upfront with her biases at the top of the review. If that makes her perspective not useful for you, just move on and read other reviewers you like.
Yes, by which I mean people who come ready to insult or insinuate or be aggressively hostile or dismissive or confrontational. Do you think this applies to you?
First you agreed to my premise, responded to my premise and now you … question it…???
This is what kids do when losing the argument… What happened to “I’m old enough to spot a troll”… How old is that …16…???
About your term… since you used it before many folks responded… Who do think it really applies to…???
Our guy (Kevin) who reviewed it, hated it with a white-hot passion.
Plenty of male critics have given the film negative reviews.
was looking for reviews to decide if i want to go watch Aquaman today, instead i got an ‘explanation’ of why Aquaman is sexist.
Now i really want to watch it to see how much of an extrapolated and surface level review with a clear bias this is. Clear that you have a political agenda you seem to be unable to shove into people’s throats.
Enjoy ur ‘blog’ , would never recommend and i only read 1 review, pretty sure what rest of the content is.
ig man=devil xD xD
p.s. i have since checked out another review about the movie: Mary Queen of Scots
The female sex is the center of the review since the first paragraph
1:s the worst thing about Mary Stuart that she is a woman, or that she is a Papist
2: They aren’t too crazy about Elizabeth, either, what with her also being female.
Why do you call this a movie review blog? If you want to post your political opinion that is great, however give us a fucking break and don’t pollute the review genre will ya? WE WANT TO WATCH MOVIES NOT BEING SCOLDED ON FEMINISM
LOL.
I want to just watch movies too. Unfortunately, our sexist culture most often does not allow me to do that without reminding me that I, as a woman, am not considered fully human.
You’ve just told us that you feel the same way.
Plenty of other film critics out there. Move along and find one whose biases align with yours so you can pretend he doesn’t have an “agenda.”
I see many more cats in MaryAnn’s future.
Does that mean MaryAnn is getting a bunch of kittens for Christmas? Awesome!!!
Is that supposed to be some sort of insult? Bwahahaha.
Hey, nothing against cats! But, as you already know, it’s a snarky implication (snark is your preferred mode right?). One that implies a future with many cats, but without a husband and children.
I understand what you were saying, but I ask again: What on God’s great green earth makes you think that a life with cats but not with a husband and children is not a glorious one? And this: What does not liking a movie have to do with whether one is married, has children, and/or has cats?
Wow! I absolutely LOVED your review. It was both snarky and spot-on, two qualities I admire. I was very much looking forward to Aquaman and left the theater extremely disappointed. Like you, I noticed the lack of women overall – both onscreen and off – and how this was basically a man’s world, full of “manly” things like fighting. In fact, that was most of the movie and it gets really boring! There was minimal plot, the environmental aspect (which could’ve been awesome and relevant) was barely touched upon and there was little, if any, character development. I had so many questions that were never answered. How was it for Arthur to grow up so different? When did he start saving people & how did he handle his fame for doing so? What does he do when he isn’t saving people (besides drinking with dad)? There were so many opportunities to have made this movie great but they missed them every time. Typical DC. Thanks for the review.
The movie fails by not having Crab King as the main character. All hail Crab King.
Wow. Not only was it a pretty bad joke, but now you’ve killed it completely. Do you do parties?
SPOILER ALERT AND APOLOGIES TO KEY AND PEELE
*David Leslie, Johson-McGoldrick, Will Beall, and Geoff Johns are sitting in the writers’ room. Geoff Johns begins*
“Okay guys, Aquaman. I’m telling you this movie should write itself. The guy talks to fish and swims fast, this should be pretty straight forward. Basically all we’re doing is maintaining the integrity of the original character. We wanna do all the stuff with the water, and the tri-
*James Wan enters the room*
“Uh, can we help you?”
“I’m sorry, let me introduce myself. Hi y’all! My name is James Magic Jackson Wan Jr. I’m the Hollywood comic book movie doctor. DC just brings me in to oversee things when they haven’t got a clue. So that’s why I’m here, but don’t mind me. I’m just gonna be over here, y’all do your thing, it’s your movie.”
*Geoff looks confused, but slowly turns back to the other writers at the table*
“Okay, uh.. let’s brainstorm. David?”
“Um, if it’s gonna take place in Atlantis, I was thinking what if there was like a big gate covered in pearls that led into the city?”
*James Wan clears his throat loudly*
“Okay, hold on a second! I’m sorry, I’m gonna step in here, just one second sweetheart. So… what’s wrong with y’all? Y’all lookin’ like a bunch of sad sacks.
This… is the A-man people. We writin’ Aquaman The Movie, it should be a party! With pizza, anchovies, goldfish crackers! Just-come on, lift up the spirits! Okay, I’m gonna put a little bit of spice into the mixture here – what if we did this: Everybody here gets to design their own action sequence!”
“Uh, I think that the um… three action scenes we have are sufficient.”
“It’s called brainstorming, not brain drizzling, sweetpea, okay? Shut your mouth for a second, look here’s the thing, none of this is final.”
“So you mean like what if there was a multi-lane highway that led to the gate of Atlantis, and it was full of cars shaped like fish?”
“Pssh, a highway into Atlantis? There’s no rea-”
“You talkin’ bout a highway full of futuristic cars with flapping fish fins that leads to a giant gate guarded by death star laser cannon turrets and security guards with sci-fi armor and energy beam rifles shaped like electric eels? That’s brilliant, it’s in the movie, done!”
“Woah, woah, you said that nothing was final!”
“That was before I heard the words, Atlantis, fish cars, and highway in the same sentence together! It’s done I love it, it’s in the movie, next!”
“What about a uh, octopus that can play drums?”
“You mean a real live giant octopus with eight legs jamming out a phat beat in a under the sea Little Mermaid jamboree, oh my God, it’s in the movie! I LOVE IT! Next!”
“What about a Colosseum fight over a pit of lava?”
“You mean a fight in front of thousands of screaming fans in a ancient stone arena floating above a huge lake of liquid hot magma at the bottom of the Atlantic ocean underneath a giant led flatscreen scoreboard with two screaming men propelling themselves at high speed using fish magic in a Atlantean UFC Dragonball battle to the death? We are cooking with gas now, I love it, it’s in the movie! Next!”
“Could there be a female Aquaman?”
“Lipstick, red wig, boobies, jellyfish dress, boy, you had me at skintight, scaly, fish vajayjay, I love it so much that it’s not only in the movie, but two ass kicking redheaded fish ladies are in the movie, and one of them lives on dinosaur island at the center of the Earth, there’s no backsies on that one, no penny taxis, yes, yes, YES! It’s in the movie done! That’s why there are no women in this writers’ room, next!”
“I don’t know… uh, a half godzilla, half squid kaiju?”
“But you DO know, cuz you talkin’ about a giant monster whose sole purpose in this film is just to give Arthur a big scary monster to ride in on in a release the Kraken, plasma breathing entrance to the final brotherly battle, yes! It CAN be in the movie, and it IS in the movie, done, next! What about you silver fox?”
“Uh… crab people?”
“You just said noun and people like you playin’ Mad Libs, you just like a child, you have the brain of a child, you do not have a high IQ, but you haphazardly came up with an army of giant crab and lobster men with elephant sized king crab warriors launching trebuchets and all done completely in CG animation? You a crazy person, and your idea’s in the movie! Done! Next!”
“Uh, can we put Ivan Drago in it?”
“What!? You talkin’ bout puttin’ Ivan Drago, amateur boxing champion of Russia, Master of the Universe, former boyfriend of Grace Jones, straight to video Swedish action movie star, Dolph Lundgren with a bad dye job and suit of shiny green armor, riding a giant sea horse, but the sea horse has hind legs and neighs like a land horse talkin’ directly to the camera with his cold, wooden delivery and cheesy Swedish accent!? You sir, are a raging psychopath. Don’t let this town take that away from you…
“That’s it!! I don’t even care anymore, we got Dolph in this bitch, so it’s done! I don’t have any more time, so let me just recap, right now it’s: Atlantean fishcars on a fish freeway, octopus musicians, underwater UFC lava battle, redheaded aqua-boobs, squid Godzilla, lobster catapults, Dolph’s gonna be in the picture, Imma throw in an action scene myself… Sicilian rooftop chase with fishbowl storm trooper laserguns and wine icicles! Just write it up! I’m having so much fun! Thank you, it’s all gonna be in the actual film, now I gotta go put some farting wizard jokes in Shazam! Sayonara folks! Oops!”
*applause in the writers room as James makes his exit. Geoff Johns clears his throat and tries to restore some semblance of order.*
“Okay, you guys know that none of that is gonna be in the actual movie.”
*HUGE EXPLOSION*
Six Atlantean soldiers with terrible aim burst into the writers’ room firing lasers.
ALL OF THAT IS IN THE ACTUAL MOVIE
SJW movie reviewer talks about everything but the movie in review… and then relates to the villain. Hey SJW’s, have you ever thought maybe you’ve strayed off message a little?
Nope. My review is literally all about the movie.
But sure, I would expect someone who uses “SWJ” as a pejorative — it’s a big word; look it up — to not think that humanity’s trashing of the planet is a problem.
Guide to late 2010’s NPC film criticism:
Plot? Character development? Pacing? Fun? Artistic achievement?
Technical prowess? What’s that? Let’s focus on what’s important…
Is the character a straight, able-bodied white man… like… I don’t
know… a blond Atlantean? If yes, the movie is problematic. If no, find something else to complain.
Are there any Strong Female Characters™ in the movie? If no, the movie is problematic. If yes, find something else to complain.
Is the lead character man of any race? If yes, the movie is problematic. If no, find something else to complain.
Is the movie just a shallow preachy propaganda outlet for the progressive
agenda? If no, the movie is problematic. If yes, proclaim the movie to
be a tour de force of modern filmmaking even if audiences avoid it like the Black Plague.
You might want to look into feminist criticism of “Strong Female Characters™”…
You’re cute, though, with your straw men.
There, FIXED. “Are there any Strong Female Characters™ in the movie? If no, the movie is problematic. If yes, the movie is problematic. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.” 🤣🤣🤣
Who are you even arguing with? It certainly isn’t the author of this review, because you didn’t understand or read any of it.
The first sentence of the review is about the plot. The. first. sentence. Three out of the first four paragraphs are about the plot as it relates to character development. The last two paragraphs deal with the pacing, effects, fun, and the plot once again, in fact, discussing the plot is kind of the main point of the entire review.
MA is critiquing a movie in a review on her own site. There are hundreds of reviews here, each of them making different, distinct points about movies using examples from the movies in question. She is honestly conveying her reactions and thoughts about movies on a site about movies.
Do you know what an NPC does in an old-school RPG? No matter which character talks to them, no matter what’s happening in the game around them, an NPC says exactly the same programmed message over and over and over. But at least an NPC only regurgitates its talking points when you initiate a conversation. I’d compare you to Navi or Fi, but as annoying as they are, at least they’re trying to be helpful.
No, you are like a random encounter with a single slime in Dragon Quest – an unwanted, predictable yet unavoidable, unrewarding, boring, archaic, time-wasting nuisance that everyone has to deal with and everyone hates. You don’t think, you don’t have conversations, you just appear and attack for no damage, then die in one hit or run away to find some buddies so you can clump together and pretend to be king.
You are not a bad person because you enjoyed this movie. You are a bad person because you came to a site about movies, didn’t read the review, have nothing to say about this movie, and are arguing with an imaginary assailant of your own making.
I’ll start. I liked the crab people. I wish the Ocean Master would have taken a big buttery bite out of the crab king’s delicious arm. I also liked the lighting and shot framing in the The Trench scene. What did you like about this movie?
“The first sentence of the review is about the plot. The.
first. sentence.Three out of the first four paragraphs are about the
plot as it relates to character development. The last two paragraphs
deal with the pacing, effects…”
Nope. The first sentence is about how the gender of the protagonist will inform the author’s opinions. The following lines are about the gender of the supporting cast. The second paragraph is jab at men in general. The effects and art direction are mentioned to complain again about men. Men (the director and his three co-screenwriters) that only seem to “create alternate worlds full of magic and wonder (…) just as fucking sexist as the real world.”
It would not be like that if the genders were flipped. In fact, lets
compare how she treats Arthur Curry — a half-Atlantean/half-human
royalty — with how she treats Diana Prince — an immortal Amazon
warrior goddess, who is the crown princess of Themyscira and the
daughter of Queen Hippolyta and Zeus:
“No, yes, please, let us continue the tradition of telling stories about men who proudly don’t care about anything thrust into positions of power and authority purely by dint of birthright.”
“She’s done it!” an anonymous grunt cheers from the trenches at the Western front after Diana, Princess of Themyscira, Amazonian goddess warrior, has succeeded in crossing No Man’s Land to the German side and taken out the enemy, clearing the path for the soldiers to follow. And I cried tears of joy.
(…)
Not only the big screen but the real world is full of the celebration and cheering on of men, even when they do things that are not worth celebrating or cheering. Yet most of the real-life amazing things girls and women do, we never hear about, and you can forget about mediocre women being cheered and celebrated like mediocre men are.”
“MA is critiquing a movie in a review on her own site.” Great! More women should be business owners.
“Do
you know what an NPC does in an old-school RPG?” Oh,
enlightened one, thank you for sharing your gnostic wisdom.
“You are not a bad person because you enjoyed this movie.” How magnanimous of you.
“You are a bad person because…” Ohhh…. 😒
“I’ll start. I liked the crab people. (…)What did you like about this movie?”
IT REMINDED ME OF ROBIN HOOOOOOOOOOOD
And the part where Little John jumped from the rock
To the Sheriff of Nottingham’s back.
And then Robin and everyone swung from the trees
In a sudden surprise attack.
And they captured the sheriff and all of his goods
And they carried him back to their camp in the woods
And the sheriff was guest at their dinner and all
But he wriggled away and he sounded the call
And his men rushed in and the arrows flew-
[Arthur Curry] did sort of that kind of thing too.
Coudn’t resist. Always wanted to do this.
Mostly, I liked that is a DC movie that does not suck. It is a bit more
colorful
than BvS and has much less teenage angst than the snyderverse. The
effects are good. It is fun. Jason Mamoa shirtless is a plus in my book.
Honestly,I’m not personaly invested in that movie as you think.
I am much more a sci-fi fan (The Expanse 💕💕💕), than a superhero fan.
But I do think it deserve more than “men telling histories about men…
yuck” the same that I think that Wonder Woman deserves more than
_”woman doing a dirty job that a bunch of dudes had been sitting around
avoiding”_ But having now perused other work of this author I won’t
find it here.
Awww, I’m heartbroken.
LOL.
It’s almost like you have zero understanding of our culture. Amazing.
Guys, guys I think this thing is busted… are you seeing this? These projection measurements are off the charts!
*projectionometer explodes as six Atlantean soldiers with horrible aim burst into the comments section firing lasers*
Seriously, I hate to use the ol’, “I know you are but what am I?” defense, but look back at what you wrote Olivia. Pseudo lesbians?? Playing the victim and always having the last word? Existentially wanting? Tilting at non-existent windmills? Puffed with gaping rage (nice Freudian slip)??
I know it’s scary to be old, generic, and desperately unhappy, but projecting your own fears and insecurities onto others isn’t going to fix anything in the long run.
The main point of the review is extremely clear: Mera is awesome and powerful and interesting, but she is a supporting character who falls in love with an oaf who doesn’t even want to be in this story and who gets rewarded nonetheless because this is a male power fantasy.
The review is critical of this aspect of the movie – if you have a problem with the review, address it using examples from the movie, and/or explain why you think male power fantasies with awesome, underdeveloped female sidekicks are a good thing. “Generic” ad hominem/projection accomplishes nothing.
At [URL deleted by MAJ] (a live-action original superheroine video series) we love superheroines who are strong, smart, beautiful and courageous. Mera embodies all of these qualities, and the more we see her on film, the better. If it takes ridiculously colorful CGI, bombastic action sequences and the rippling muscle of a shirtless Hawaiian to help make that happen, we’ll take it.
Spamming my comments with links to your own site gets you banned.
When NPC’S hate a movie, you know it’s good, this is pathetic, keep cry honey
Ah, I see. You observe a dislike for assholes, and you think this must be a dislike for men, because the only men you know are assholes.
Oh boohoo another silly bitch who sees the world through their prism of political SJW narrative. What a sick brainwashed socialist open borders fuckette you are. Can’t enjoy anything for anything, cultural vandal cunt.
I love the “you need to get laid” thing. These troglodytes seriously believe that a good deep-dicking by the likes of them will make a women less feminist. When the opposite is the case.
Because it’s true
Everything *is* sexist. And you’re banned.
Also: Requiring that women be “ladies” is a way to keep us quiet and compliant. Fuck that shit.
FYI for those in the back: this crap gets you banned.
Are you still crying? Maybe because you are a retard
Hilarious. You are right to be afraid…
The fans of this movie are embarrassing the director:
[https://twitter.com/creepypuppet/status/1079518577147822081]